Isaac the Cow Milkin' Man
by MooMoo1
Summary: Isaac, Garet, Mia, and Ivan have bought a farm, and had some fun with the neighbor's farm animals. The neighbor isn't very happy about it, either, and he takes them back! Will Isaac lose the farm? Please R&R!


I don't own ANY of the Golden Sun characters. . . .Or do I?! . . .No, I don't. Anyway, onto the greatest story ever written (Ego almost bursts out of my skin). . .  
  
ISAAC THE COW MILKIN' MAN  
  
By: MooMoo  
  
Starring. . .  
  
Isaac!: . . .No?  
  
Garet!: lolololololo u suk  
  
Ivan!: I'm the smartest here! I'm so great! I'm so-(Big boulder falls on Ivan)  
  
And. . .  
  
Mia!: (Sigh) Why do I always have to be the responsible one. . .?  
  
  
  
And now, without further ado.  
  
ISAAC THE COW MILKIN' MAN  
  
(Isaac is chewing on a chicken. Mia bursts in, all angry-like)  
  
Mia: ISAAC! What did you do to Ivan?!  
  
Isaac: . . .Yes?  
  
Mia: Have you seen him lately?  
  
Isaac: No.  
  
Mia: Come and see what I mean.  
  
Isaac: Yes.  
  
(They go outside, and see Ivan staring intently at a cow)  
  
Isaac: . . .No?  
  
Mia: I think he's trying to mind read it, or something. . .  
  
Ivan: So true, Bessie. . . How did you get so wise?  
  
Isaac: No.  
  
Mia: Yeah, I know. He's been like this all afternoon.  
  
(The chicken Isaac was chewing runs past)  
  
Isaac: !!! No!  
  
(He runs after it)  
  
Mia: (Sighs) I knew we shouldn't have bought this farm.  
  
Cow: Moo.  
  
Ivan: Yes, Bessie. . . You are infinitely wise.  
  
Mia: Hey. . . where's Garet? He better not be "getting friendly" with the sheep again. . .  
  
(Garet suddenly appears, carrying two pigs and grinning like a madman. . .wait, he is a madman. Bah, just keep reading)  
  
Garet: Hey, Mia! Check this out!  
  
(He sets them down, one on top of the other. The one on the bottom starts running around and screaming loudly with the other pig still on it's back. Garet starts laughing uncontrollably)  
  
Garet: Ha ha ha! Get it? Get it?! He's giving him a piggyback ride!  
  
(Garet falls over, laughing at his own bad joke. Ivan comes in, riding on the cow. He looks at the pigs for a couple seconds)  
  
Ivan: . . .I feel your pain, Pig Queen and Pig King.  
  
Mia: Grr. . .  
  
(She walks back into the wooden shack, leaving Garet giggling on the ground and Ivan atop his bovine steed)  
  
(Isaac appears, with his clothes all dirty, grass and leaves in his hair, holding a chicken upside down by its legs)  
  
Isaac: Yes! YES!  
  
(He triumphantly laughs, but it sounds more like "Yes No Yes No!" than "Ha ha ha ha!". Meanwhile, an old man with a piece of straw in his mouth waddles up)  
  
Mr. Old Hick (Moh): H'lo there, sonny.  
  
(Isaac keeps "laughing")  
  
Moh: Derm whippersnapper! (He hits Isaac in the head with his cane)  
  
Isaac: No. . .  
  
Moh: Is this here yer farm, sonny?  
  
Isaac: . . .Yes?  
  
Moh: . . .I see. It seems though that you took my ding dang old farm animals there, sonny.  
  
Isaac: No.  
  
Moh: I be taking them now. . . .Godderm! What'd yeh do to mah Ms. Hennypeckens?!  
  
(Moh points at the tooth marks left by Isaac)  
  
Ivan: (Arms crossed, in a matter-of-factly tone) She prefers to be called Helga.  
  
Moh: Derm old youngsters. . .  
  
(He grabs Ms. Hennypeckens (Or "Helga") and the pigs. Garet suddenly stops laughing, and stands up)  
  
Garet: Hey! You put those pigs down!  
  
Moh: These're my pigs, young 'un! (Turns to Ivan, who is still on the cow) Off the cow, son.  
  
Ivan: No! Bessie wants to stay with me!  
  
Moh: Off, now.  
  
Ivan: No! I don't wanna! (Breaks into tears) I don't wannaaaaaaaa. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!  
  
(Moh hits Ivan off with his cane)  
  
Ivan: Waaaaaaaaah!!! We'll save you, Bessie!  
  
Cow: Moo.  
  
(Moh walks back to his farm with his farm animals. Mia walks back out)  
  
Mia: I heard Ivan was crying. What happened, the cow kicked him because he was trying to suck the milk out of her teats?  
  
Isaac: Yes.  
  
Ivan: (Still crying) Shut up, Isaac! Stop being such a bully pants! Waaaaaaaaah!  
  
Mia: Ivan, shut up. We all know you're not really crying.  
  
Ivan: (Back to normal) Eh, it was worth a try.  
  
Garet: That dumb old hick took his farm animals away from us! Mia, go over there and give 'im a spanking!  
  
Mia: Garet, they're HIS animals. He has a right to take them away. Besides, I don't spank the elderly. Now, Isaac on the other hand. . . (Winks, and walks back into the shack)  
  
Isaac: (Eyes light up) Yes! (Rushes into the shack)  
  
Garet: This isn't right! We have to get those farm animals back to us!  
  
Ivan: Yes. . . I have an idea! Meet me at the barn, at ten o'clock tonight!  
  
Garet: Ehh, I dunno about ten. . . My TV show's on at ten.  
  
Ivan: Garet, we don't have a TV.  
  
Garet: Well, I like to pretend we do. . .  
  
Ivan: (sighs) Fine. How about nine?  
  
Garet: OK.  
  
(Garet and Ivan walk off)  
  
END OF CHAPTER ONE. . . 


End file.
